Shopping Calms Me Down

I think that shopping takes me away from everything. Whenever I am mad, stressed, or sad I will go shopping and it will keep me in line and on track. I think this is probably the only way to keep me from doing stuff I really don’t want to do. The only problem is that I spend most of my money on things I only like at that moment so by the time the next morning comes; I don’t remember why I bought the things I have or I don’t even like it anymore. It’s probably 30% of things in my closet I don’t wear at all. I have at least three pairs of shoes I wish I never bought. Sometimes I would wear some of the clothes just to see if they fit my style but by the end of the day somebody else would probably own it. I kind of regret buying some of it but then I think about how if I didn’t buy it I probably would have gotten into many arguments or fights because I didn’t calm myself down by shopping. Many people believe that shopping is boring and tiring. For me, shopping is my escape. I think throughout my life my shopping habit will slow down but I won’t ever stop shopping for this reason. I think this is a technique that many people should try. You may never know how soothing it can be unless you try it.

I'm Just Criticizing Nicely

I hate telling people the truth because the person always gets mad at me for the things I say. I understand the things I say might upset you but hey that’s life. In life one has to accept the criticism that is given to change some things about themselves. Maybe the things I’m saying are to help that person change for the better. My point is why you would get mad if I’m only trying to help you out. I’m not attempting to bring you down or make you feel as though I’m talking bad about you. I thought that good criticism is given for the bettering of one’s personality or to help fix the work that they have done. Whenever I give advice I try my best to sound calm and polite. I try to use nice words to let the person know that I am not against them and I only want to help. If the person takes the advice wrong, I try to make them feel better or act as though I could be wrong. Even though I would be trying to help a friend out, they always get mad at me. Maybe the way I handle things could be the wrong way. Regardless of the nasty feedback, I am going to try my best to fix the way that I say things and try harder to make it sound more polite and trusting. I think that criticism is a good way to understand and get a better view of life.

Be Yourself Man!

One thing that annoys me is when people act a certain way just to have friends or to get attention. This is basically explaining to the world that you are fake and you have no reason to have friends. I know a few of my friends or associates that prove me right about them each day. I try to ignore them but they make me mad so much that I have to make it known that they pushed me to a point of no return. I know that childish people would do things just to add fuel to the fire so I don’t blow up the way I want to. To calm myself down I would try to do things that would take my mind off the things that happened. I don’t pay them any attention after that or I try the best to ignore them. I know that they want my attention so I go about my business. Regardless of the situation I try to be myself and keep to myself the best of my ability. Whenever the person comes near me I would walk the opposite way or talk to other people, keeping away from them. In other words forget that person, I could care less.

Living With 40 Year Old Kids

Sometimes it feels like I live with no one but 40 year old children. I don’t understand why parents or in my case; guardians, act so childish. My guardians make me so mad because they are always trying to do things to make me mad. I laugh at them because they know that I won’t let them make me mad and I give them the dullest conversation ever. I think it’s funny that they try their hardest to get my attention or find something so that they can yell at me or take one of my privileges away. Now that I’m 18 it’s hard for them to do much against me. Each time that we get into an argument, I always relate to that fact because they know that I am too old for the punishments they try to give me. I hate that they try to yell at me for the dumbest things or try to blame me for things that I can control. I always get into trouble for not eating or finishing my tasks. They fail to realize that I could care less about anything in life and they know that for sure. If I don’t ever respond to any of the things that they say that just rule out that I don’t care and they are right. I don’t even like to talk to them at all.  

Ready For The World

Time is going by so fast. Before I know it, it will be time for me to put on my gown and walk across that stage for my diploma. It’s crazy because it still feels like school just started and now it’s almost over. I feel like I haven’t had as much fun as I wanted to or lived as wild as I wanted to.  Each day I look for new ways to live life to the fullest. I’m kind of upset that my home school does not involve us with any of the activities but that’s fine. As long as people know who I am and what type of person I am, I don’t really need to take part in any of the activities. I’m nervous about being at college and felt as though I had a longer time to get ready but now I see that my time has run short. Making sure that I meet all the requirements for college is by far the most stressful thing I’d ever had to deal with besides preparing for my senior project. I feel like now I have the smoothest ride because my grades are goof and always have been good, I passed OGT’s on the first try, and my ACT scores are reasonable enough for myself to get accepted into college. Since I have everything together I am ready for the world.

I Don't Need Liars

Liars make me so sick. I hate when you already know the truth and the person who lied to you will continue lying towards the point where you may need to show unnecessary proof. I figure if you know you are lying to me just be real with me and tell me what’s going on. People mix pain with anger. My feelings aren’t hurt until after I confront you and you continue lying to me. To me that is the biggest sign of disrespect and you never cared for me in the beginning if you had to lie about every topic we come across. Each incident with a liar I move farther and farther apart from them. Soon I won’t even reply to any of the person’s text messages or calls. If I have to be around that person I won’t look their way or acknowledge the things they say to me. At that point the liar won’t even exist to me anymore. If you care about me you wouldn’t force me to do these things to you. Maybe you should just be honest with me the first round we had together. After dealing with so many liars in the past I have the lowest tolerance for it. I don’t even get mad about it anymore or bring it up to the person; I just simply make it a point to avoid them as much as possible.

Levels Of Disrespect

Yesterday was kind of crazy. While my friend Amber and I were walking to the store, some guys were yelling inappropriate things at us. At first we didn’t pay them any attention until they threw a bottle at us. This made me very angry because that was so disrespect.  I just want to know what possessed them to even think that was okay to throw things at females regardless of the situation. I was so upset that I couldn’t stop thinking about it. The whole walk to the store I was thinking about it and why would they do it. It kind of hurt my feelings because you would expect that the younger generation of males would learn to have respect for females of all ages. I had to go home and fume how I felt about it to my cousin. He said that I shouldn’t have been so upset about it because it didn’t hit us but still it made me very mad. That made me thinks what if that bottle would have hit us. What could have I done to let them know they hurt or offended me. Either way I think they wouldn’t have cared but I would want them to feel the pain or anger I feel.